What Anxiety Actually Is, Because It’s More Than ‘Just Worrying’.

Anxiety is the restless nights of sleep, as you toss and turn. It’s your brain never being able to shut off. It’s the thoughts you over-think before bedtime and all of your worst fears become a reality in dreams and nightmares. It’s waking up tired even though your day just started. Anxiety is learning how to function with sleep deprivation because it took you until 2 am to shut your eyes. It’s every text you wonder ‘how do I word this properly?’ It’s a double or triple text in case you messed up. Anxiety is answering texts embarrassingly fast. Anxiety…

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Why Your Intuition Is Never Wrong.

I’m going to be open about a situation i’ve touched upon but haven’t really talked about because I think it could help others who have found themselves in similar situations.  I know i’m not alone when I say that I was once cheated on (it was actually multiple times). No the person did not “sleep” with another person, but there eyes did wander to other women and even to the point where he went out to grab coffee with another girl (turning off his phone so I couldn’t call him). I remember that morning so clearly, I was living abroad on…

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Choices.

In life we are always left with two choices. The one that we believe is the right choice, because we are comfortable. Then there is another choice, one that asks us to go outside of the normal and not follow the heard we call society. but as we stand in front of both options we tend to go for the one most comfortable. Why do we do this? Is it because we know everyone else is walking this path and no one will judge us or our fear of rejection is minimized. How can we become extraordinary people if we…

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Cheers to the Haters.

I came across a quote a few days ago: Pay attention to the people who don’t clap when you win. I’ve pondered and come to the realization people who claim to be “supportive” of me to my face aren’t quite as they seem. I vow to live a life surrounded by authentic people, people that I can learn, laugh, and grow with. I’m not going to live a life where someone feels the need to offer my empty smiles and words. Yeah, it took me a lot longer than the average person to find my passion, but you know what…

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The American Dream.

I think one of most thought provoking commercials from yesterdays’s Superbowl 51 was a commercial from a company I would lest expect it from. A commercial too controversial to air in full length because of it’s political views. I find it interesting how this commercial was viewed by different people, and possibly that was 84 Lumber’s intent, so that they didn’t alienate any customers. I see it as though they are in support of the wall to keep illegal migrants out, but they are also in favour of an avenue for legal immigration to occur down south. Whereas many view…

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The Presidential Inauguration

Today was the first day of Trump’s administration. You’re probably thinking, why do you even care since you’re Canadian. I care because I am an educated woman, a minority, and a global citizen. I get it, Trump winning was not a surprise, I knew it was coming as soon as the debates began to start. Everyone keeps talking about how it was “unanticipated” that Trump would win. That because his campaign was misogynistic and sexist it would lead to his downfall. But when you followed the media and the voices of the people you could see the dissatisfaction at the bureaucratic level…

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Learning to Fail.

Today I arose from a deep slumber (perks of being sick) to the frantic texts of someone I care about, let alone to seeing them cry when I FaceTimed them. It turns out they got a C+ on their one exam, when on their others they received a B and B+ respectively. While a C+ isn’t the greatest mark, it’s not the worst mark either. Upon trying to come up with a way to console them I decided the best way to go about it was to be honest and realistic. I’m not going to coddle someone and tell them life…

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To All My Fellow Healthcare Professionals.

Yesterday I moaned and complained about having to go to my Community Service Learning class (albeit it’s once a month) because I felt it was completely redundant and useless. No other nursing school starts placement in the community until second year, so why did we have to sit through this? Shouldn’t this just be inherent knowledge? I mean it’s pretty obvious we’re all caring, intuitive, and kind individuals going into a profession that is often taken for granted. The truth is, no one in nursing school, healthcare aide programs, or even medical school teaches you the skills of compassion or…

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The Power of Grit.

“Ability to learn is not fixed, that it can change with your effort” Growing up I was always seen as the “weaker” student compared to my fellow peers. Whether it be starting off in French immersion school and being told I couldn’t handle it or starting off grade one having to be taught to read privately or even moving to grade 5 and not being able to keep up with my peers in math or writing. I was told with my grades I would never move on to university by my own parents. However, upon watching this Ted Talk I…

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Good Riddance.

2017… I dub thee, the year of BYE! I plan on making a lot of changes in my life this year. A lot of changes involving who I am, and who I want to become. I make terrible choices sometimes. I’m a good person… But not very good to myself. I need the most work in that department. I am sick and tired of letting people walk all over me in a repetitive cycle. Using me. Blaming me. Bullying me. Being fake with me. Judging me. Taking me for granted. But this year I am going to really work on…

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Nurse in Progress.

For someone that came out of one of the toughest years of her life, I must say I am pretty proud of myself for pushing through. The struggle of feeling left down, unconfident in my abilities, and personal struggle led me to believe I wasn’t worthy of good things. That because of all my struggle I would be a failure and wouldn’t even make it through the first semester of nursing school. But I did it and I did damn fine. The nights I spent crying and very much struggling to stay focused and motivated paid off. I mean anatomy…

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Small Steps.

Today I finally was able to see a psychiatrist after waiting a couple months for this appointment. It’s really sad to think to gain access to such an important resource it takes booking months in advance to see one. To be honest, it was not what I had expected. Aside from taking my health history (#nursingstudentproblems), he didn’t do much talking aside from explaining what depression was and it’s causes and changing my medication to address both my depression and newly acquired anxiety. That evil gremlin that keeps me up at night, gives me racing thoughts, and makes me more…

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Learning to Love What You Do.

It’s only the beginning of working towards my career as a nurse. Oftentimes, I question whether i’m good enough to take on such a large responsibility. Whether I have the capacity to love and care endlessly for all the patients that will come into and out of my life. But then I think about the adrenaline rush I get from reading about treating illness, the mysteries behind disease, meeting new people with interesting stories, and the feel of wearing a uniform that’s well respected. The first term of nursing school has been hard for many reasons. Going through a break…

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Finding Strength

Sometimes you just need to step back and take a moment for yourself. There’s only two options to dealing with the stresses in your life, you either take them in head on and push through or you walk away. But the struggles you face today can be a stepping stone to building your strength for tomorrow, so keep fighting. Live for the moment. Show compassion to yourself and others. Keep your chin up. M

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Winning is Habit

“Winning is not a sometime thing; it’s an all the time thing. “ “You don’t win once in a while; you don’t do things right once in a while; you do them right all the time. Winning is a habit. Unfortunately, so is losing. There is no room for second place. There is only one place in my game, and that’s first place. I have finished second twice in my time at Green Bay, and I don’t ever want to finish second again. There is a second place bowl game, but it is a game for losers played by losers. It…

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Finding Yourself.

There are holes inside each of us that long to be filled. Needs that we desire to have met. For by filling the void, we don’t have to feel the emptiness that resides there after losing someone you loved. The hole can represent the need to seek approval, the yearn for someones affection, one that needs the sense of security knowing someone is there or one that longs for a form of validation that make us feel like we are enough. There’s time in our life where we all search desperately for ways in which we can “fill the void”—an aching,…

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