*fall has entered the chatroom*

I have a lot to ramble about so here we go, folks. For what it was this summer was amazing. I just wish i could have savored it more with having worked through so much of it. Even though COVID postponed a lot of my travel aspirations post-graduation, I was still able to find so much joy in this season and reconnecting with old friends and meeting new ones. I’m sad to notice the change in weather and the fact that it gets dark so early now. Below are some snippets from the summer.

I honestly get apprehensive during this time of year because my depression rears its ugly head during this time of year. I think it’s just a mix of the cold weather, the greenery changing colours, and the darkness that is to come with winter.

I’ve been feeling really unbalanced lately and it’s not even really fall yet. Just feeling moody, could be realted to stress and the changes I have been adapting to and it sounds completely ridiculous, but i get anxious about feeling a little depressed & sad. Kind of like I can sense that it’s just the beginning, and I know it’s going to get worse. Like the sense history will be repeating itself. I have definitely been more concious in trying to protect my own energy whether through booking vacation time off work or finding creative or healthy habits to work on like hiking, hanging out with old friends, or updating my blog.

We have had a high census and acuity level in the NICU. It’s been heavy and hard and sometimes I just want to quit at times because it’s so overwhelming. However, I am so fortunate to have such an amazing bunch of nurses, RTs, and physicians who have supported me along the way. When I have a good shift it feels amazing to be in such a position and to reap the rewards of another good shift, but the Bad Shifts are so bad.  I’m still learning so much every shift, but i’ve settled well into my floor’s community. and I love the people I work with. But some of the stories have been so sad lately.

In order to spice things up in my nursing career, i’ve accepted a part-time/casual position as a correctional RN at a local detention facility. I know floor nursing isn’t my long-term passion and expanding my knowledge and skill set is so important. Especially with wanting to work towards policy, politics or ethics working with an underserved and complex population will be both a challenging but also hopefully rewarding experience.

Speaking of which HOW DARE 2020 continue to take a downward spiral with taking RBG with it. As if 2020 hadn’t been an already rough enough year for many of us.

RBG. A champion of equality and women’s rights and a great example of what it means to have tenacity and perseverance. A role model that many young females including myself looked up to in advocating and fighting for a more progressive society. Regardless of how this will lead the US Courts, she leaves behind a lasting legacy.

Hoping 2020 starts to take an upward turn from here on out.